Need a listening ear
Hi Everyone,
Hope you’ve all been good boys & girls. Been super duper busy with work, and slowly getting the hang of it. Keeping my fingers crossed about certain things at work and I should be able to enjoy a nice Xmas and New Year, possibly a big fat CNY. 
Catch up soon peeps.
Left my job, currently unemployed. Things didn’t work out too well for me there, though I must say I did enjoy the company, the people, the culture etc. Hopefully, somewhere down the road, our paths do meet again.
Back in that shit-hole phase of transition yet again. I’ve got several interviews lined up tomorrow morning, praying its the last few rounds. The feeling of being lost in transition is beginning to wear me down, clawing at my confidence and my abilities. Assuming I do clinch it, I’m not sure if I can perform up to expectations and if I’m cut out for it.
Trying to pass time and get myself immersed in Project Life: Sports. Just went to the driving range this afternoon with Fatt Choy. 2nd time that I’m playing golf, and starting to get the hang of it. What I enjoy most about the sport is the greenery; calms my nerves and it allows me to be with myself. Bowling’s getting better as well, at least I can still beat my brother at it..haha. He’s throwing the ball a hell lot better than me though. Snooker ain’t too shabby, reckon I can give Rusty a game and not lose by too many points when he gets back. Trying to get rip by hitting the gym 3 times a week now…no longer a 1-pack. muahaha…
Its times when I run out of activities that I feel….depressed. Loneliness sets in and I tend to indulge in self-pity, re-evaluating my life and whats left of it. Sometimes I feel like I was robbed of something precious n dear to me, and think how I could prevent that from happening. BUT, perhaps it wasn’t meant to be mine. Perhaps the sense of loss can be overcomed, somehow. Still finding ways to do so, and if you do know of any, please drop me a msg. Other times, I rationalize that loss and choose to think that it didn’t mean much, that it didn’t matter at all. It’s like strolling on the streets during winter, and you lost your gloves. Your fingers start to turn cold and numb, and you wish you hadn’t been so careless. However, there are alternatives: put your hands in your jacket or stick them in your pants; else you can simply buy another pair.
Wish I could tell myself how to treat this situation as easy as a pair of gloves.
“The robbed that smiles, steals something from the thief.”
Just did one of the craziest things in my life. Wrote a nice short note to Ms. B&J and got my colleague to pass it to her at her office. It reads:
“Ever done anything out of the ordinary? Neither have I. Starbucks @ 5pm? – Adrian, 24th Floor.”
Praying that she appears.
Went down for an ice-cream at Macs, and bumped into B&J again as I was going up in the lift. Her name’s Denise, the imaginery target no more! Time to plan for my next step……
Apologies for keeping my avid readers in suspense. Things went well 2 evenings ago. Had a few laughs, multiple sips of coffee, endless chatter, and realised we had several things in common. Can’t remember when was the last time I had a conversation with any individual for that length of time. Haven’t lost it after all…heh.
Just went down for a breather and met B&J! We were walking towards each other and I couldn’t help but notice her noticing me…hah. Should have reacted quick enough and ask her to join me for breakfast instead of letting her walk on by. She’s got great hair, great skin, the works. About time I did something apart from admiring her from fair.
“The robbed that smiles, steals from the thief.” How true….I’m smiling once again.
Going for an interview later this evening, with all my eggs in this one basket. Gotta win this hand, else I’m out. All in. Star Cruise on Sat anyone? Need a break from work, and also to celebrate my freedom.
As the title reads, it’s been awhile since I last updated this space as my life has been kinda blah lately….until yesterday.
Project Life is definitely back on course now. It has been awhile since I last dated, 3 and a half years give or take. Received a call yesterday evening from Ms. Definitely and arranged to meet up. Immediately went to get a hair cut and get myself prepared for this evening….hahaha. Feel young and full of energy once again. Called Mr. Ultrasound-when-on-the-phone-with-gf whilst on the way home and almost burst out in tears. Was trying so so so hard to contain that sense of elation, jubilation, exhilaration…….Wooohooooooooo
Dear Lord, please do not wake me up from this dream. Thank you for everything that’s happening; family, career, friends, personal. Amen.
Bus rides, to and from home, are one of those times that I look forward to everyday. Taking in the sights and the sounds can be a very ‘enriching’ experience. Was taking the bus back home yesterday and everyone was standing shoulder-to-shoulder as usual. Right next to me were these 2 girls, both around early twenties. Here’s an excerpt of their conversation.
Girl 1: Eh, when’s your period arriving ah?
Girl 2: Not sure leh, I never reallie keep track of my dates.
Girl 1: I’m overflowing at the moment, feel squishy down there. Can’t wait to get off.
Girls, it’s ok if you really have to discuss these issues in public, but could you keep the volume down? They were happily sharing female hygiene topics at the top of their voices for all to hear. Sheeesh.
I’m feeling goooooood.
Been pretty busy with work lately. Things are picking up in the office and the work seems to be piling up. At least it beats having nothing to do, keeps me occupied. I’m still unsure about which career path I want to embark on at the moment though.
Project LIFE seems to be taking off well. My latest adventure is learning how to play the guitar from my 13 year old brother. Still trying to figure out the 6 bloody strings, stopped when my fingers start to spasm. Sway by Michael Buble is not too bad for starters I reckon.
Was the Rog’s birthday a couple of days ago, went to Village for dinner and drinks after that at Alley Bar. I’d like to take this opportunity to apologise to Rach again for losing weight. I promise never to do that again, but I swear that aryan at Village who was walking up and down several times to take sauce for her dish or whatever reason was checking me out la guys. Muahahahah…… Been working out at the gym and running once in awhile, so I’m beginning to pile on again.
For the first time in 2 years, I’ve attended church religiously… at least for the past 2 months. And NO I’m not going to church to get to know chicks. Reasons why I’m back at church is because:
1) It’s one of those rare moments in which I feel a sense of serenity,
2) Spend more time with the folks, at least it makes them happy
I’m getting better at controlling my emotions now I reckon. Please vouch for me my dear friends, or kup me in the head if you think likewise. To sidetrack a little, I’m nearing the point of ‘numbility’ with regards to my emotional health. Numbility is inspired from Rach’s ‘Humbility’, which in proper engreeesh is Humble. Using poker as an analogy, ‘numbility’ basically refers to how a player feels when he/she has dug a reallie big hole for themselves on a $20 buy-in and losing does not matter anymore.
That’s it for now boys n girls., gotta get busy in the office. Later.
Feeling uncomfortable and uneasy all over, cos for the first time since I’ve known her, I’m not celebrating her birthday. Organized parties for 2 of her birthdays, had a simple affair last year as she was sick. Likewise, she did the same for me. Our birthdays together were always special. I want to make you happy today, and every other day for that matter, but I know you have found someone else to do that for you already.
Happy 23rd Birthday Baby. Love you always…
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